THD M1s 3-2 Southgate M2s
Saturday 4th February 2023
Dulwich College
Narrator: Arthur Mitchell
Life in London Premiership hasn’t been all rosy for THD men’s 1s, with 1 win from 14 after a narrow defeat last week against East London. However, inspired by Coach George’s terrible golf stories, they set out to set the record straight against a high flying Southgate team supported by an international coach.
The team went ahead through a flick from Matthew ‘Messi’ Poole late in the first half and then exchanged goals with Southgate (the returning Arthur Mitchell on the scoresheet) before Mr Messi himself scored a blistering reverse stick to put the game beyond doubt.
The lads could probably have made it easier for themselves if they had picked up fewer cards - not least the ghost card that captain Babak tried to award himself for no apparent reason.
Huge games coming up, starting with a trip to the other end of the northern line for a date with West Hampstead.
As it goes for many epic battles in THD history, there are many alternative narratives of this stoic event.. and we have collected the ones provided to us below, for the ones of you strongly driven by curiosity or instinct for fact checking.
Narrator: Matt Poole
Once upon a time..
George Lovegrove, an amateur golfer, is haunted by memories of leaving too many putts out on the green. One day after being charged by the pro shop for rage quitting after scoring 14 over through the front 13, he is sent to coach a peewee hockey team as recompense. George is reluctant at first, given the team’s standing just above the relegation zone. However, he eventually gains the respect of the boys and with some good advice from his wife (who reminds him that the love for the game is in having fun whilst playing, as opposed to focusing on the score line), he reminds the team how to win. George’s team ultimately face off against top of the league, who are oddly coached by George’s club shop pro, giving George a chance to face his old ghosts and finally prove to himself that he can score single figures. The team win 3-2
Narrator: Milo Kite
Once upon a time..
In a world of specialisation those who excel in multiple areas separate themselves from the pack. That's why when Milo Kite dared to _Run_ ™️ when others walked he cemented himself in THD lore. _The Run_ wasn't just a sporting highlight we see on our timeline every now and then, it was a message to those who were told they weren't good enough, that the odds were too slim, that CBs didn't do that. And the message was "Do it". The message was "You are worthy". The message was "You are strong". We are all believers, we are all achievers, we are all Milo Kite.